A Discussion (Or Why I'm Passionate About Public School)

I've deliberately taken a long time working on this post because I want to approach this topic with both honesty and sensitivity. I want to be careful  to guard against mixed motives so that I can simply share my heart. Despite all of that, it would seem this isn't really a conversation I can ease my way into. So before I share with you on why I'm passionate about public school, I want to let you in on why I think this kind of discussion is both a positive and healthy thing.

There are so many things that divide in this world: social class, economic status, race, gender, religion, politics. You don't need to have been alive for too long, or look too far to know it's true. As followers of Christ we're called to show the world the peace and reconciliation that can only come through Jesus. This isn't what we're known for, though. We have a reputation for being judgemental and closed minded. We divide ourselves by denomination, our taste in worship, building style, church names and theology.

Do we really believe that salvation is through Christ alone? Or is it also based on having the perfect theology? We say that we believe that there are things that aren't essential to our salvation and that God can lead people in different ways but still these things divide us. Finding the perfect theology is not even a possibility, but sometimes we react to opposing theology as though it were. Sometimes we react almost as though our lives depended on it. (I know because it used to be me.)

Even if it may not always be comfortable or easy, it's essential that we learn to talk lovingly and openly about things we disagree on. We need to challenge ourselves to listen to opposing views and listen to what others have to say. It will help keep us loving and understanding one another. Listening to and learning from each other in love even when we disagree has the potential to be an incredible witness of God's very real and life changing love in our lives. (This is not to say there won't be a huge learning curve - at least for me there certainly has been!)

The book of Proverbs was the first book of the Bible that ever came alive to me. I was 17 years old and I couldn't get enough of it. I poured over the verses again and again trying to soak it all in. Chapters 1-9:18 contrasts wisdom and righteousness to folly and evil doing. It warns us not be enticed by evildoers and to not turn away from righteousness. A couple of friends of mine shared a verse with me that comes from this section in Proverbs and when I looked it up I was really excited to read the verse that comes right before it. It says, "Ponder the path of your feet and let all your ways be established. Do not turn to the right or the left, remove your foot from evil.". The Hebrew definition of the word ponder means to "to roll flat, ie. prepare (a road); also to revolve, ie. weigh (mentally): -make, ponder, weigh".

Let's ponder the paths of our feet - together!

I'm one of those people who loves having my children at home. I love snow days, summer vacation, and any kind of holiday. I kept both my daughters home during their JK year and I'll do the same for our son. I had fun teaching them the basics at home in a very laid back environment. S was ready to read and R actually was reading by the time they began SK. They both excel academically and thrive socially despite the fact there are some who think JK is essential for both of these things. I'm so happy I kept them home that one year, it's something I know I'll never regret.

One of the things that has a large impact on my view of things is my own personal life experiences. I went to 3 different elemenatary schools and 2 different high schools. One of the highschools was a Christian high school. I ended up making my closest friends at church and youth. I had a lot of fun hanging out with my friends just being silly as well as having great conversations and building deeper connections. These friendships were (and continue to be) incredibly fun and fulfilling, but it wasn't until I was an adult that I began to learn how to connect with people outside the church walls. I remember being taught that I should "be" a witness, loving people, letting God work in my life to impact the people around me, but the only people around me already believed. To be honest, there's been a pretty big learning curve for me. This is why I see public school as a great way for my children to learn how to build relationships with people who don't share their faith. When I imagine who I'd like them to be as adults, I imagine vibrant, passionate, uncompromising people who share Christ in practical ways everywhere they go. At this point our children are still young enough that Jason and I are involved in everything they do, which means we can take this as a time to help them sort through all of the things they see that they won't see amongst our Christian family and friends. My heart is to teach them to be set apart and be filled with love. To me it has more to do with who they will one day become not about putting pressure on them now to perform.

As a child I also learned to confuse being good and moral with being born again. I learned to categorize sins and felt that being a good Christian primarily involved avoiding moral failure even though Jesus says that even the thoughts of our hearts have the power to condemn us and that as it says in the book of James, "each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed.". This is why I also see public school as a great opportunity for learning to recognize that no one else can be blamed for the condition of our own heart. They will choose thier friends and they also get to choose their behaviour and attitude. If they find themselves tempted I see this is an opportunity for learning a spiritual truth - that they themselves are in need of a saviour!

Which leads into another truth I didn't learn until I was an adult: that being a believer doesn't mean being good in my own strength. Even if I could do everything "right" and lived a good and moral life without making any mistakes it wouldn't be enough. It's the very reason Jesus died - to rescue me from my sin - and he didn't stop there. We're no longer left to earn our salvation by fulfilling the law in our own strength in order to earn our salvation. At the same time the standard has been raised: it's not about our behaviour but the thoughts and the condition of our heart. This is why I also see public school as a great opportunity to learn that being a believer is about Christ in them. I began talking to my girls about this before they started school, teaching that that when they struggle with their attitudes and behaviour they need to trust God to change their hearts. They can work on changing their behaviours - and they should - but even as they work on their behaviour and make good choices they need to rely on God`s strength. I like to remind them that when they feel frustrated, hurt or if they need to lovingly stand up for what's right that God is with them. Even when there may be people who aren't as easy to love they can rely on God's love in their hearts. We do work on this at home but going to school provides even greater opportunity for them at an age when Jason and I can teach them and help them walk through it. My heart is to help them work through these issues gradually over time instead of being shocked to have to deal with everything all at once.

Recently I've even begun giving the girls a bible verse to think about during the day. The girls have both shared with me about moments when they've had opportunities to rely on God. I want them to learn that "Christ in them" begins now, they don't have to wait until they're older.

I also love that public school provides me the opportunity to put our faith and trust in God into action. It provides an opportunity to teach them how incredibly real and powerful what God has done is. That God can give us the discernment we need to separate lies from the truth. That what Christ has done is more powerful than those lies. That by His grace we can be witnesses simply by believing and allowing that truth - God's truth - to transform us. I see it as a great opportunity to teach them how to respond to different opinions by considering what others have to say and then prayerfully comparing it to what the Bible teaches us and the nature and character of God (which is revealed to us in Jesus Christ).

Shane Claiborne talks about our need to connect with people - all people - in his book Irresistable Revolution as a way of coming to recognize our own humanity:

When we look through the eyes of Jesus, we see new things in people. In the murderers, we see our own hatred. In the addicts we see our own addictions. In the saints, we catch glimpses of own holiness. We can see our own brokenness, our own violence, our own ability to destroy, and we see our own sacredness, our own capacity to love and forgive. When we realize we are both wretched and beautiful, we are freed up to see others the same way.

Even though he's obviously not referring to either children or school I can't think of a better way to describe it. We're all wretched and beautiful. Every single one of us. I don't want my children to miss out on the wretchedness in themselves (how else can we truly see our need for God?) or the beauty in others!

When I talk about weighing the risks I suppose this is what I mean: when the passion and the urgency God has placed in my heart to use this time to teach my children these things outweighs what might otherwise be considered risks. I don't see public school as being a fool-proof way to raise my children to be believers anymore more than I think homeschooling or Christian school is. Public school also requires being actively involved in what goes on with my children every day, even though I'm not actually there. Jason and I both talk with them about what they're reading, seeing and hearing and how to think about and respond to those things. We continually remind them that they're not alone, that they can have their own personal faith in Christ even when we're not there and they`re in an environment where not everyone believes - because that's the power of Christ in them! It's up to them as to whether or not they will make it their own and it's the power of the Holy Spirit at work in their lives that will make it real - not anything we say or do - but more and more I see public school as an opportunity for allowing Jason and I the chance to teach them what it means to be a believer.

There are no guarantees. There is no program, no curriculum or learning environment that will protect our children from all of the things we'd like to protect them from. But I love how public school can be a chance to teach my children some of the things I've only learned as an adult. Things that are central to my faith in Christ. It's certainly not the only way nor is it always going to be easy. But this is the world we live in, the world Jesus came to save. I love the prayer that Jesus prays for his disciples, "My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one." I think it would be fair to say that when Jesus prayed we're being given a glimpse into the heart of God and that Jesus would pray the same thing for us.

I find that as a parent I'm sometimes tempted to try and shield my children from ever making mistakes. But no one makes it through this life without making any mistakes. I can feel God stirring my heart to trust Him more deeply and not to focus on protecting them from making mistakes but to focus on teaching them that it's all about Him. And that the hope that is in us is not only for us but for those around us. My prayer for my children is that they learn how to relate to people even those who don't share their faith and live uncompromising lives relying on God's strength, trusting in Christ alone for their salvation.  

I continue to be amazed by God's grace in those moments God has been right there giving Jason and I the words we need to teach our children how to respond or how to discern God's truth in situations. The girls have both shared stories of how God at work in their lives not only at home but at school. It's been exciting to see God working in their lives. I can't wait to see what else He has in store!